The way to an expat’s heart…
Source:
Creative Commons/ Xiaozhuli
When you move to a new country, you expect
changes. You figure you’ll learn a thing or two, develop some new habits, maybe
get frustrated and shake your fist at times, shed a tear or two. But if you
can, you move to another place excited about the differences, ready to embrace
the change and make the most of it.
At least that’s how my American family has looked at our seven years of living abroad. We’ve had our share of hiccups, complications and second guessing our decisions, no doubt. But more than that, we’ve changed, taken on new ideas, altered our thinking, tried new things and some of us (the children) have mastered a new language.
All that is well and good; an enrichment of
life and a shift in thinking have made our expat life worthwhile beyond
measure, sure.
But I have to admit the thing that I enjoy
most about our lives in the South of France is the food.
Ah, yes, my favourite topic of thought,
conversation, study and practice—the French table.
Food, shopping for it, reading about it,
cooking and eating it. It’s a popular past time these days. I love a cooking
show as much as other ‘foodies’ out there; colorful cookbook towers stacked on
bedside tables along with a mix of
beautifully photographed cooking magazines , food memoirs and the odd
novel. This is what we fall asleep reading.
So, lucky me to live in France where food
is one of the most seriously guarded and precious aspects of national image.
You don’t mess with the French and their food.
Each region has its signature dish, produce
and style of cooking. I made the grave error one night at dinner with French
friends, five French women asking me what I thought about French food, when I
said that the thing I miss the most about American food is the variety. Alors! But variety exists here in
France, they said. You can find every type of food across all the regions in
France. Variety abounds!
Um, yeah. If you only want French food.
That’s the thing they don’t get. Their food is such a big deal, such a symbol
of national pride, that they don’t see that for foreigners or ‘etrangers’ the whole of it falls under
the heading, ‘French food’.
Some of us want Thai, Indian, Cuban and of
course, this Texan girl wants her beloved Tex-Mex. All of which you can easily
find in America. That’s variety, my French friends. Of course I would never say
that. I only agreed, back pedaled, acted like they were teaching me something
new about variety and the world of different food.
This protective pride is what makes French
food special. Bestowing government protection on varieties of cheese, only one
cheese in the world can be called Roquefort, safeguarding wine blends by
allowing only certain varieties of raisins
to be grown in certain regions, regions sometimes distinguished and divided by
a creek or simple dirt path, making it a law for restaurants to print where
their meat comes from and if they use frozen ingredients on their menu. All
these things are what make French food, French.
For the most part, the French eat
seasonally. You’ll find some exotic things like mango and passion fruit at the
big grocery stores no matter the season. Maybe some green beans from Kenya when
the French ones have all been canned or eaten up in nicoise salads, but generally the produce department changes with
the seasons. What you won’t find are strawberries or stone fruits in
mid-winter, no cherries in March, and absolutely no cantaloupe or melon until
early summer.
All that makes sense, for a variety of
reasons like the cost of flying out of season fruit and vegetables from the bout du monde, but the most important
part to me is simply this. It tastes better when it’s grown a few kilometers
away. The cantaloupe melons grown in a nearby village are the most delicious I’ve
ever eaten.
My family has changed in the way we regard eating and meal times, especially snacking and when and how to do it. It’s subtle, like most resounding changes, and it has made a difference to the way we live and look. Yes, I said look. The eating what you want and not getting fat thing that you’ve no doubt heard of and wondered about yourself? That’s down to one thing--snacking. Mindless eating, the middle of the day, whenever the mood strikes you, nibble. They just don’t do it.
One of my daughter’s little friends was
over one day after lunch (they would never schedule a play date during the
lunch hours of noon and 2pm) and they were running around outside, swimming and
playing. I figured they might be a bit hungry for a snack so I offered one. The
8 year-old French girl’s immediate reaction to this offer may shock you.
She didn’t immediately say non, merci. She didn’t jump blindly at
the chance to eat something, either. What she did do was look at the clock. And
when she saw that it was 3:30 and not later, she said no thank you. Simple.
It’s just this. You don’t eat at 3:30. That’s not gouter or snack time.
My children eat at school most days, in the
cantine, where they’re served a
seasonal five course meal, where they eat with real utensils, course by course,
over half an hour or more and where no
one puts fork to mouth without everyone saying, ‘Bon appetit!’ and beginning together.
They can ask for seconds of the starter and
main course that are usually served family style in the center of the table.
Things like beets in mustard dressing, radishes with baguette and butter and
shredded carrots are typical starters or entrees.
Main dishes of roast chicken, cordon bleu,
and lemon fish are some of my kids’ favorites. The French eat like this most
days at midday. This is the main meal, the one to sustain you until snack time.
And it does sustain you.
My children have better table manners. Even
the 4 year-old is learning. ‘Bon appetit!’
he shouts before every evening meal (of course he shouts it, we’re still
Americans after all). But the days of wheeling the kids around in the grocery
store trolley, quieting them with snacks of banana, apple chips, crackers and
string cheese, torn and half empty packets lolling open and sticky on the
checkout belt, are gone. French people just don’t walk around eating things at
all times of day. It would be weird.
There’s a sea change all over I think.
People are going back to farmers markets, growing their own (I could never do this
as my thumbs are black as soot) and learning and trying new things. It’s
exciting and fun and then you get to eat it. I’ve learned how to make things at
home out of necessity that I would have relied on a restaurant to make for me
before. We’re back to Tex-Mex again, you realise.
I’ve tasted things in French restaurants that
have moved me. I’m talking close your eyes and savor the moment delicious. So
sublime was one egg that I couldn’t stop thinking about it and had to make it
at home. Something I never would have done back in Texas, maybe because I could
always just pop back out and have it again. Also because I have never seen a
soft-boiled egg breaded and fried and served over an earthy mushroom cream
before. That’s France for you.
France has taught me how to enjoy food;
portions, patience, and quality are the secrets of a good meal. Be it curry
night or homemade pizza chez nous,
the portions are reasonable, there’s not a lot of fuss or dishes per course and
we eat slowly, savoring and talking as we go. Before France, we always ate
together as a family so this isn’t new. It’s the way we do it here that’s
different, that has changed us. It will be a part of my childrens’ relationship
to food and fellowship forever.
Bon appetit!
About
the author
Aidan resides in France with her family and blogs at Conjugating Irregular Verbs.
Follow her @aidan_larson
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Aidan, I enjoy your blog so much. I feel like I can almost taste the egg that you describe.
ReplyDeleteIt's so fun and interesting to read about Americans' experiences abroad. You must be having quite an adventure.
Keep up the blogs, so we can live vicariously through you!
This was perfectly written, entertaining, and spot on! Living in France is all about the food, and for me personally, I think it's impossible to move to France and not change the way you view food and how and when you eat it. I appreciate the sanctity of the meal here and the quality of the food, but sometimes, a girl just wants a little Tex-Mex, and maybe at 3:30 in the afternoon :)
ReplyDeleteLovely post fellow foodie and so true. Nothing beats seasonality, portion control and French school diners are about so much more than just 'food'.
ReplyDeleteGreat article! The food is one of the things I love about living in France the most, too. And my girls don't snack. They voluntarily wait until 4pm for their gouter. Sometimes they sit in front of the clock waiting though :)
ReplyDeleteReading your blog has just made my day! Thanks for the fantastic insight into the French relationship with food. Fab!
ReplyDeleteWell said, Aidan! French food has changed our relationship with food as well. Two years ago if you would have told me I would be roasting duck, making meringue and cooking my chickens whole I would have laughed out loud (well, probably snorted, but you get it). Thanks for sharing this insightful post!
ReplyDeleteLove the post, Aidan. Here in the states, health officials are in such a tizzy over the obesity epidemic. And part of it is definitely the amount of food most Americans eat--how big of a soda do you REALLY need--but its also the quality of that food. We are over here eating too much really bad food instead of savoring high quality what we need food. love the variety, but can enjoy my TexMex in very reasonable portions. I've also been trying to adopt a more expat attitude with the TexMex margaritas: just tequila, fresh lime juice and triple sec. Much purer than sugary mixes. My portion control, however, could use a bit of expat restraint.
ReplyDeleteGreat article, Aidan. So many suggestions for improving our relationship with food AND family. But alas, old habits are hard to break. Maybe a trip to France is in order!
ReplyDeleteHold on, let me put down my fig newton...it sounds divine. You make me want to pack my bags and go back to grade school. In France. I loved the part about the French women telling you about all the varieties of (still french) food. Brilliant.
ReplyDeleteI coudn't agree more! I remember after yet another visit to Paris I commented to a friend that one startling difference between Paris and London that no-one seems to mention is that in Paris - people generally just do not snack in the street. Not a chocolate bar, bag of crisps or sausage roll to be seen.
ReplyDeleteThe French are also the masters at portion size. There may be several courses and wine too but on closer inspection (and although cheese and butter abound) each course is modest in size.
As you say, there is a definite dearth in international cuisine and on at least two occasions I've heard of Indian or Thai restaurants setting up in rural France and closing within a short period of time. The demand is just not there among the French.
I live in Cyprus for much of the year and a similar seasonal eating pattern exists. Sometimes it's just bananas everywhere for a while and then a glut of oranges - rolling in the roads too!!
Really enjoyed your post - Bon appetit! :-)
Aidan! My family is now fascinated with your post about French eating habits. I'm challenging myself to make it through my next grocery shopping trip without feeding my 5 year old a Zbar or something similar!
ReplyDeleteWe're curious about breakfast and dinner now that you've described lunch.
Can't wait to read more from you, my friend!
Very nice post, Aidan. And very true for all of us who are American living in France. I am beginning to discover!
ReplyDeleteThanks everyone for all your thoughtful and kind comments. I'm glad you enjoyed my take on eating French.
ReplyDeleteaidan xo